C3 Church: REALationships With Pastor Michael Murphy

From Australia, C3 Church welcomes Pastor Michael Murphy as our guest speaker.

Pastor Murphy begins by talking about his 29 years in marriage. They have three kids (27, 24, and 22).

In the early years, he thought their marriage was "toast" or done. This is just after 12 months in. His wife, Valery, had a past that was different than his.

In his message, Michael will air his dirty laundry to bring resurrection to your marriage in an effort to bring hope. It's not about the other person completing you, but about helping you become a whole person who is restored. Fill your life up with God.

As a young teen, Pastor Murphy was sexually abused by a man at age 14. In the process of proving his manhood, he hurt a number of women in his life. At 18, he was drinking and having sex. This ended up in having a baby. It wasn't until years later that he finally met his daughter. It was messy and not perfect. His daughter came to destroy her father, but God intervened.

There is a big difference between what is seen on the outside and what's really happening on the inside. We, as people, are excellent mask wearers.

Because of his wife's dad, who had post traumatic syndrome from WWII, she struggled with a challenging upbringing. As explained in the book, Dancing With My Daddy, she tells a story of parents who argued all the time and an early marriage where her first husband left her for someone else.

Let God break every chain in your life.

Michael avoided arguments like his family did, while his wife turned up the volume on their arguments. [The audience laughed]

Years later, Michael and his wife went back to her house where she grew up. At home, she saw this huge tree that she planted years ago. While God was watering her life, he was also watering that tree. There is a tree like this in your life.

8 Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. 9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. ” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Corinthians 12:8-10

In the first year of marriage, Valery and Michael asked the question, "What happens if you think you married the wrong person?"

It's not about the past or hurt. Women understand this and have been hurt by a man before. In a meeting with a ladies group, Michael confessed to them that he was "that guy" and he apologized on the behalf of all men. All of a sudden, a woman screamed from the front row. Come to find out she had been raped only 6 months earlier. She let go of that issue that day.

To the ladies in the room, he apologized for all the things men have done to them. It is up to you to make a difference moving forward.

He says that he doesn't deserve all the goodness in his life. His kids are amazing and he says that he doesn't deserve that.

There was a time that Pastor Murphy fell in love with the ministry. He was very passionate about it. In talking about Matt and Martha, Michael shares how family friendly they are.

In going to another meeting, Michael relives a "discussion" he had with his wife. She asked him, "Do you want to know what your son did?" She said, "He jumped up and wanted to you a drawing he did in school." As a result, he cried. I realized how involved into work he had become.

Do you have to a perfect parent? No. However, with the grace of God, he can break every chain. God wants to breathe new hope into your life. God's heart is for you. All you have to do is extend your withered hand and ask God for help.

God's on your case. You don't need to stay on this treadmill.

Here are a couple of principles:

See Your Marriage Renewed

In the morning, your spouse may not be all that perfect. She/he may not be the same way as when you married them.

When God created Adam, he gave him a job. This is why a business person can become a workaholic. Is the price you're earning worth the price of pain?

Do you have the guts to make a decision to make a legacy with God. God gave Eve a relationship. This is a distinct trait given to women.

This is not to say that women cannot work in the marketplace, of course they can.

God explains that the ground men till will be difficult. For women, they would have pain in birth. Those strengths can also be a vulnerability.

For men, without a job, they can worry themselves sick. It can affect the entire relationship.

22 that you put off, concerning your former conduct, the old man which grows corrupt according to the deceitful lusts, 23 and be renewed in the spirit of your mind, 24 and that you put on the new man which was created according to God, in true righteousness and holiness. Ephesians 4:22-24 (NKJV)

It is a conscious decision to put off the old man (that's not your husband).

Let's remove the mask. You can have a renewed relationship. Allowed God to flow over you and your relationship. Show him your weakness and white flag.

You Can Thrive Despite Your Inadequacies

Judges 6 tells the story of Gideon.

Michael talks about Gideon. God spoke over Gideon. As a result, he delivered the children of Israel.

David was a shepherd boy. Moses couldn't talk so good. Abraham and Sarah were barren. In all cases, God used them mightily.

God sees you and your withered body, mind, and spirit. You can focus on your brokenness, dysfunction, and errors, or you can break those chains. His arms are open wide to you.

You Can Win the Good Fight of Faith

As a younger single person. God has put a word of hope in your life. By believing our inadequacies, God says "Stand for your marriage."

While in Virginia Beach, VA, Pastor Michael talks about a young guy. The boy says that his time in college got interrupted because of his sister's death. Despite the loss of his sister, he felt he was spiritually prepared.

The night before his sister died, the guys dad sent him a scripture that stuck with him. It nurtured him in the time of loss.

God is saying, "There is hope and an opportunity to thrive."

At the same time the boy received a scripture, his sister received a scripture from Revelations.

16 They shall neither hunger anymore nor thirst anymore; the sun shall not strike them, nor any heat; 17 for the Lamb who is in the midst of the throne will shepherd them and lead them to living fountains of waters.[a] And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes.” Rev. 7:17 (NKJV)

Paul said to believe in the Lord Jesus Christ. By extending his withered hand, the Jailer's life turned completely around. You can have the same thing in your life.

Do You Need A Fresh Start?

If you need hope or help. God wants you to know that he loves you. Jesus died and rose from the grave. If you would like to know Jesus as your savior then pray this prayer.

Dear God, I realize I've sinned and I need you. Thank you for dying on the cross and rising from the grave. Come in to my heart and save me. Thank you for giving me eternal and abundant life. Help me to live for you, for the rest of my life. In Jesus' name. Amen.

To share your story, want more information about next steps, or just in need of prayer, please contact Pastor Matt Fry.

Photos From Around C3 Church